Registered Clinical Counsellor . Vancouver and Online

Attachment Based & Psychodynamic in Vancouver and online

Relationship Counselling & Couples Therapy

Build relationships that feel good

Offices in Vancouver, East Vancouver and Kitsilano

Let’s have a conversation about your concerns and how I can help. My offices are in East Van and East Kitsilano.  

I welcome people of all backgrounds and identities.

 

Feel free to book a free 15 minute call to learn more about my approach and how it maps to your concerns.

Is Your Relationship Life Quietly Exhausting?

Even our closest relationships can leave us with self doubt, frustration or anger. We may begin to question compatibility, our boundaries, or even our own perception — whose needs matter most, and who holds the truth?

Relationship difficulties are more common than you may think and they often show up in subtle patterns such as:

• You over-give and feel unseen.
• You pull back and feel alone.
• You struggle to assert your needs or views.
• You ask for reassurance and then feel ashamed.
• You tolerate tension to keep the peace.

Relational patterns are not random. We are set in patterns that do not serve us and we lack the right skills and attitude to build and nurture healthy relationships so we drive ourselves into trouble.

My approach to relationship and couples therapy

Relationships are hard. Coming together of people with different backgrounds, nervous system make-up, and personality requires a lot of awareness and skill. Love can solve all our problems, but love alone is usually not enough. We frequently run on patterns of behavior or beliefs that we are not aware of. These harm us from being alive and present in our relationships.  

I believe we build relationships that feel more alive, secure, and real after we know ourselves, let go of patterns that don’t serve us and heal from emotions that may be trapping us. Healthy bonds grow out of our commitment to being healthy and loving. I provide a therapy that helps you understand your conscious and unconscious relational dynamics and let go of habits or cycles that don’t serve you and help you open your heart to supporting your relationship. I support you in letting go of the mindset of who is right, without being blind that sometimes, in a conflict, one of the parties  may be causing more pain.

 

My approach is informed by: 

  • Psychodynamic and attachment-based therapies
  • Relational Life therapy (Terry Real)
  • Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) 
  • Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy (PACT).
 
 
  

“Unconscious emotional and attachment patterns silently shape our relationships “—

We change when we see the patterns, heal and take responsibility.

What is the process like?

Uncover patterns

Analyze relationships and notice how you show up, the roles you take, and how you participate in the dance of connection.

Find what's underneath

Discover the beliefs and emotions that quietly shape your behavior, and begin loosening patterns that keep you stuck. 

Build & Grow

Grow your authentic self & relational open-ness to form and keep healthy bonds. 

This work is for:

Build relationships that feel good

Discover how Relation therapy in Vancouver can help you feel more confident, and grounded in your relationships.

Hi, I am Malahat

I am specialized in depth-oriented and attachment-informed psychotherapy.

Therapy is not only a method. It is also a relationship.

Many of the patterns that bring people to therapy were once intelligent adaptations — ways of maintaining connection, avoiding hurt, or carrying responsibilities that once felt necessary.

Over time, these strategies can begin to limit your freedom in relationships.

In therapy, we explore these patterns with curiosity rather than judgment. Often, change begins when long-standing expectations about relationships are gently challenged by a different experience.

What you will find in our work together is a space that is:

 

• thoughtful

• emotionally grounded
• attentive to complexity and focused on your goals and plans.

I have a Masters in Counseling Psychology and I am a Registered Clinical Counsellor (# 21215). I work in person in Vancouver, BC and Virtual across all BC.

How long does Couples Therapy take?

It depends on how long you have been in conflict and how much pent up issues we are dealing with. 
For couples that are having some conflict but are both looking to improvement, a few sessions is enough to enable them to open up, understand each others emotions and strengthen their bond. 
When conflict is more complex, I usually alternate individual sessions with couple sessions to prepare you, and if both are committed we could see improvements in 15-20 sessions. 

 

2-3 sessions are enough for you to gain insight into your relationship and some of your patterns. Some start personal therapy after that to heal their attachment insecurities and/or other deeply seated emotions that may be hindering their relational success.

Yes, I love working with LGBT couples. I think relationships are at core the same regardless of sexual orientation or identity.

Yes, I myself belong to a ADHD family and have lived experienced of the issues and dynamics. However, my process for Couples or relationship therapy for ADHD relationships is not different.

No, in my perspective that requires its' own focus and specialization. I don't have that.

Some couples that have conflict or emotional distancing may experience sexual issues as a symptom. I can help with that. In some other cases, sex itself is a core issue, those need a Sex Therapist. I don't have that specialization.

It is a good idea to be committed and engaged on your own. However even a few sessions with a therapist can give you direction and tools to continue on your own.

  • Handling conflicts with calm and attentiveness

  • Awareness of your own, and others’ emotional needs

  • Letting go of resentments and healing relational wounds

  • Feeling more connected, and the skill to nurture connection

  • Good judgment about responsibilities toward others (and saying no with no fear or guilt)

  • Setting boundaries confidently while being compassionate.

  • Ability and motivation to build connections with the right people.

  • Seeking closeness with people who are the best fit for you

Less Loneliness, More Joy & More connection 

How relationship counselling and Couples Counselling benefits you

What results can you expect?

Reach out to me, feel free to ask a question

When Self-Esteem, Anxiety, and Relationships Intertwine​

One person changing shifts an entire relational system.

 

For many people, relationship struggles are closely connected to self-esteem and anxiety.

You may find yourself questioning your worth after conflict. 
Or feeling responsible for maintaining harmony in a relationship.
Or becoming highly attuned to subtle shifts in someone’s tone or mood.

When relational security feels uncertain, the nervous system can become vigilant. Small signals begin to carry large emotional meaning.

Over time, this can lead to:

  • chronic relational anxiety

  • difficulty trusting yourself

  • fear of abandonment or rejection

  • patterns of over-accommodation or emotional withdrawal

Understanding these dynamics often becomes an important part of healing both relationship patterns and anxiety.

These experiences are rarely separate.

They tend to live inside the same emotional system.

Ready to Explore?

Start the journey to understand your relational experience